moments

Well, I'm off across the big, big sea in just a few days.

When everything is just for the moment, I find myself anywhere but present in that moment just before the moment.

Just be present now. 

I've been trying to tell myself that a lot this week.

Yes. I know it is Tuesday.

There are a lot of things to think about when you're on canal tours, or eating dutch pannenkoeken, or biking along the country roads of Holland. Like, a summer job or college enrollment. Or travel insurance, or what's on the schedule for tomorrow?

But what I want, what I should be thinking about is that moment. How my Oma is so happy to be here with her granddaughters. How amazing it is that I'm here. I thought I would be retired before I finally made it to Holland.

Even now, one of the first warm days of spring, I'm worrying about tomorrow. Airports are scary. Will I find my ride? Will I get my bag? Will I find food?

Okay, maybe not the last one.

Just be present now. To not live in the now, is to be ungrateful for the past. Is to have fear of the future. So where is thankfulness? Where is faith? But to live in the present. Ah. That, my friend, is faith, and joy.

And to be anxious, "about your life," is faith in the wrong place. Self. And that's pride. So am I humble in the moment? Am I trusting that God is truly the Lord of my life? Or am I trying to be in control?

These next two weeks are going to be a test for me. Will I simply be present in the moment? Will I live to be grateful, and faithful, and humble? I hope so.

Now, to not be anxious about that...

"Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow,

 for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. "

Matthew 6:34